The Before I Go workshop is much more than about just the legal necessities. Just as important was to explore what each of us needs to know about continuing life without our partner. It is easy to remain ignorant of key information our partner holds for us – where the fuse boxes or stop-cocks are; what important documents we have, and where to find them;  etc., etc.. Discussing everything has brought on a depth of intimacy between us, that on its own is worth while experiencing. Looking at the possibility of incapacity, and death for either one of us has not been the dreadful subject one could imagine.  Now the ball is rolling it feels good and positive. 

I highly recommend working with Jane when going through this process; her coaching and psychotherapy background means she approaches this from a truly qualified angle, yet always sensitive as she has been through a related experience herself. 

As doctors, we say ‘prevention is better than cure’. Jane’s approach to end of life is very positive. She provides all the tools for a plan which can be easily accessed at the time of death by any member of the family. Because it has been taken care of many months before, there are no surprises, so loved ones feel the immediate benefit and can go forward with confidence knowing what was wanted, even just by doing the ‘Before I Go’ quiz. I say ‘Prevent the Pain with the Plan’.

Without Jane's help, we wouldn't have done anything other than a will and some financial information; and we'd have been much less organised. Through the work with her, and the very useful discussions and information, we got clear about what we wanted and didn't want, and wrote it down. Jane had a gift for getting us disciplined in a very supportive way, and working together as a couple doing this has made us realise how invaluable it has been. 

Jane’s journey through caring for her husband and her subsequent grief after he died is an inspiration for anyone wanting to move on but needing the courage to do so.

One of the joys of doing your course is that you plant the seed of thinking about your own death and little seedlings pop up in unexpected places that lead to a fully grown tree of life. The course was a surprisingly life affirming thing to do and you steered us through it with just the right amount of firmness, laughter and joy whilst also holding the sadness too.

Reading Gifted by Grief is a healing experience.  Jane has written a raw memoir, as her friend Andrea Gardner says, that is intimate and spacious, private and revealing, and honest and wise. In sharing her journey with grief, Jane helps us with our journey too.  I feel lighter each time I read another bit of her manuscript. In witnessing her healing, I am experiencing my own.  I trust that you will experience something like this too.