5 Reasons Why Death and Divorce Are Not the Same Thing – and 5 Why They Are

By Jane Duncan Rogers / July 17, 2016 /

One day, about 2 years after my husband died, I was at a social occasion with a group of friends I’d known for a while. One of them was suffering the aftermath of a recent divorce, seeing her ex-husband on the arms of a younger woman around town.   “Sorry”, she said, looking at me…

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3 Non-Actions To Take When Anxiety, Grief and Not-Knowing Are Your Bed Partners

By Jane Duncan Rogers / July 8, 2016 /

Fear gripped me, like a vice around my guts.  I treaded water in the swimming pool in which I had arrived for an early morning dip, before the heat of the day became too much. My friend had called from the terrace rooftop of the villa in which I was staying in Italy, on holiday.…

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What Sort of Impact Do You Create in The World?

By Jane Duncan Rogers / June 22, 2016 /

Muhammad Ali made a huge impact in the world throughout his life in many ways, not just his boxing. But he also made an impact in his death too – he had stated beforehand just how he wanted his funeral to be. Not only did this mean his executor and family only had to carry…

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Passwords – Keep Private or Share?

By Jane Duncan Rogers / May 25, 2016 /

In the UK’s Saturday Guardian, Adam Golightly writes an anonymous column (Widower of the Parish) recounting his challenges each week as a new widower and father to two children, since his wife Helen died in early April. This week, he faced another apparently small, but in experience huge, problem. The one of passwords. In my…

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One Simple Step to Integrating Loss, Endings, or Death into Your Life Right Now

By Jane Duncan Rogers / April 25, 2016 /

Life, it could be argued, is loss made manifest. From the moment a child is born, there are moments of loss – loss of who they were as a baby, a toddler, a young teenager. It continues into older age, with loss of interest in what fascinated us when younger, loss of energy for some,…

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Why What You Say to Someone Who Is Grieving Is So Crucial

By Jane Duncan Rogers / January 28, 2016 /

“Everyone’s grieving is unique, and only luck helps us strike the right note in talking with the bereaved. ” So said Mariella Frostrup in last week’s Observer magazine. Yes, grief is definitely unique in it’s expression through each person. But do we really depend on luck if we are talking with those who have been…

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Grieving, Guilt and Letting Go: 3 Pointers That Help

By Jane Duncan Rogers / January 12, 2016 /

When your loved one dies initially, your world is consumed with thoughts of them. You expect that, others expect that, and while it is extremely painful, there is a kind of appropriateness about it all. After all, it IS painful when someone dies. But further on, what happens when you feel moments of peace or…

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5 Tips on How to Cope With Christmas When Your Loved One Has Died

By Jane Duncan Rogers / November 30, 2015 /

How to cope with Christmas? Even the thought of it can be a nightmare when a loved one has died, and especially a partner, child or other person you were living with. I created this infographic as a quick way to help you with managing not just the day itself, but the run up to it.…

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Death, Grief and Paris Attacks

By Jane Duncan Rogers / November 15, 2015 /

When something like the Paris attacks happen, the words ‘gift’ and ‘grief’ absolutely do not sit well together. They are not meant to. How on earth can there be a gift when someone dies? It’s not possible. In the moment, there is only shock (even if you have been prepared for the death), horror, tears, sadness,…

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Trusting, Waiting, and then Taking a Step Forward

By Jane Duncan Rogers / November 4, 2015 /

We can relatively easily see that loss might hold a gift for others. But when it happens to us, in the face of unspeakable sorrow, pain or grief, it’s not so easy to see any gifts at all. In fact the idea just goes out the window as you feel like railing against life, are…

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