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In the UK’s Saturday Guardian, Adam Golightly writes an anonymous column (Widower of the Parish) recounting his challenges each week as a new widower and father to two children, since his wife Helen died in early April. This week, he faced another apparently small, but in experience huge, problem. The one of passwords. In my…
Read More“Everyone’s grieving is unique, and only luck helps us strike the right note in talking with the bereaved. ” So said Mariella Frostrup in last week’s Observer magazine. Yes, grief is definitely unique in it’s expression through each person. But do we really depend on luck if we are talking with those who have been…
Read MoreWhen your loved one dies initially, your world is consumed with thoughts of them. You expect that, others expect that, and while it is extremely painful, there is a kind of appropriateness about it all. After all, it IS painful when someone dies. But further on, what happens when you feel moments of peace or…
Read MoreHow to cope with Christmas? Even the thought of it can be a nightmare when a loved one has died, and especially a partner, child or other person you were living with. I created this infographic as a quick way to help you with managing not just the day itself, but the run up to it.…
Read MoreWhen something like the Paris attacks happen, the words ‘gift’ and ‘grief’ absolutely do not sit well together. They are not meant to. How on earth can there be a gift when someone dies? It’s not possible. In the moment, there is only shock (even if you have been prepared for the death), horror, tears, sadness,…
Read MoreWe can relatively easily see that loss might hold a gift for others. But when it happens to us, in the face of unspeakable sorrow, pain or grief, it’s not so easy to see any gifts at all. In fact the idea just goes out the window as you feel like railing against life, are…
Read MoreNo 1: Open Your Doors to All Feelings Imagine you are a house. Grief (in the form of fear, anger, guilt, sorrow, sadness, despair, you name it) comes knocking at the front door. The instinct is to lock the door and block up the windows to keep it out. But the feelings are so overwhelming…
Read MoreGrief hiding a gift? I do not think so! Queuing in the fish and chip shop in the high street of the small Scottish town where I live, I scowled at a man ahead of me in the queue. He was overweight, fiddling with his cigarette packet, and aged about mid-50s. What was wrong with…
Read MoreGrief never ends is a very common belief, but it’s not true. Grief changes, because when you grieve a loss you are on a journey, whether you like it or not. A journey is about travelling, learning, growing; making mistakes, discovering and exploring. During this you will be changing; you can’t help it. So ditch the…
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