3 Tips on Making End of Life Planning Easier

Sean Grant|

How to make end of life planning less difficult 

Making your end of life plan easier can be more enjoyable than you think.

From brainstorming ideas, finding support, and finding knowledge, in this article you will be able to discover all kinds of good gems to help you make your end of life plan just a little bit easier.

3 Tips on Making End of Life Planning Easier

3 Tips on How to Make End of Life Planning Easier

1) Brainstorm 

When you think of an end of life plan, what’s the first thing that comes to mind? 

Are you anxious that there’ll be so much work to do? 

Bewildered by where to start, or what to continue with?

Or are you excited to make your end of life just the way you’d like it? 

Everybody’s different, some people enjoy picking out their funeral music, whereas others dread to think about it. 

There’s no right or wrong way to do this exercise. 

Instead, simply make a list of all the subjects that come to mind when thinking about your end of life plan. 

You probably won’t get all of them (that’s okay!) 

It can be anything from wills, sorting out financials, funeral preferences or last wishes, to sorting out who gets what, or the kind of legacy you’d like to leave behind. 

The point of this exercise is to get you familiar with thinking about the subject. 

After writing down your thoughts and reading them a few times, your brain will automatically begin to create and collect new information that springs to mind. 

And once you’re familiar with a general idea of what an end of life plan may look like, it’s time to share your thoughts with someone else!

2) Find Someone To Discuss End of Life Planning With

Finding a loved one or a close friend to discuss this topic with can be daunting. 

But this isn’t about planning anything concrete yet – that comes later. 

Rather, it is to share a challenging subject with each other, so you don’t need to go through it alone. 

For all the topics you wrote down previously, share them with your partner and let them stress test it. 

Often a second pair of eyes can help you discover pieces of information which were lost or previously forgotten. 

Also, ask your partner questions, and don’t shy away from challenging yourself. 

Questions such as, ‘do you think this could be done in a better way?’ or ‘what would you have done differently, if anything?’’ can be very insightful. 

There’s no such thing as a silly question! 

3) Always Learning 

To get better at any activity, it’s always key to have a learning mindset. 

And the beauty of end of life planning is that there is a plethora of information online for you to find. From personal experiences, books, online seminars and specialised support, there’s plenty of good educational sources to help get you started. 

But that can be overwhelming, and make it almost impossible to even begin. So where is the best place to help make your end of life planning easier? 

Before I Go Solutions!

By using End of life planning tools, courses and specialised training you, and/or your family, will be able to prepare much more easily for a good end of life. 

Individuals from around the world share in their experiences through the Before I Go Solutions resources to help give others the knowledge that has been key in helping them, creating a sense of community as they do so 

The simplest way for you to get your end of life planning started is to get a copy of Jane’s book, Before I Go: The Essential Guide to Creating a Good End of Life Plan. If you’re the kind of person who is good at taking action on your own, and following exercises in a book, then this will do the trick for you.

If you feel the need for more, then… 

Take A Look 

You can check out The Before I Go Method here, in it you’ll find all the information you need to get started with your End of Life Plan. 

If you feel like having some fun, you can check out the End of Life Planning Card Deck, alongside your print Workbook to make it an entertaining game with yourself, friends and family, check it out here. 

But if you’re looking for specialised help, our team of amazing licensed facilitators are always available, take a look here.

Share this:

We recommend:

The BIG Method

Use the Before I Go Method to create an End of Life Plan in 10 straightforward steps – without losing focus and giving up!

More like this:

Getting Unstuck With Jeff Ikler

Getting Unstuck With Jeff Ikler

February 14, 2023
A Gift This Valentines Day

A Gift This Valentines Day

February 8, 2023
Dealing With Bereavement

Dealing With Bereavement

February 2, 2023
Ask What Their Understanding Of The Situation Is This is an obvious question when you think about it, but it is very often overlooked in these days of the medicalization of dying and death. The more common situation is that someone is told what is wrong with them, and assumptions are made as to what this means. In particular, the assumption that the patient wants to be kept alive (sometimes at seemingly all costs) can often get in the way of what that person may actually want. As a relative or friend, you may be in a better position to simply ask ‘what do you understand is happening to you?’ When I asked that of a friend who was dying in 2014, she said she knew she was coming to the end, and she accepted that. But she wanted her body to get a move on – she was finding the slowly drawn out nature of her death to be quite a challenge. She was also quite clear she wanted a certain medication to be stopped, and another started. Finally, she told me she had said all that needed to be said, and that she was ready to go. This conversation helped me to be with her during this time. Be Willing To Accept What Is Happening To Them It can often be the case that family members are the ones who are most distressed about their loved one dying. Hence the ironic situation sometimes heard of when the one who is dying ends up comforting the one being left behind. It can really help a dying person if you are able to simply acknowledge anything they want to say, accepting it without denial. This means you will have to come to terms with it yourself, putting their needs ahead of yours. It’s not uncommon for those who are closest to the dying person to actively want them to die, so that their suffering is ended. I remember simply wanting my late husband to be out of pain, and free from a body that just was not working any longer. I knew it would be difficult for me without him, but when you love someone, you don’t want them to be suffering, even if it means it will be harder for you. Listen For The Metaphors Often a dying person will ‘give a message’ to a close loved one, in such a way that only that person can understand it. Iit is often a message demonstrating their understanding of what is happening. Because I had read lots of stories of this happening, I was very aware when Philip told me he wanted to watch what had been his favourite TV show, Countdown. By this time he had been in hospital for 6 weeks, and had been told there was nothing more that could be done. He was too ill to be moved, so we knew the end was coming soon. He said he wanted to watch Countdown, a popular British programme focusing on numbers and word games. Wanting to watch TV at all was very unusual as he hadn’t requested this for the whole of the previous weeks. But when I heard that he wanted to watch ‘Countdown’, I knew he was telling me that he was ‘counting down’. I found this to be very comforting – the fact that I knew he knew what was happening helped me to be calm for the next couple of days as he became weaker and weaker, less awake and unable to speak. This is a time for tenderness, open hearts and respect shown to all concerned; and it is made easier when we are able to talk honestly and openly about dying, about death and about grief. It is only when those topics are forbidden in some way, or that we are frightened of them, that problems arise. Naturally conversing in this way is part of a good end of life, and part of any plan that is made for that end. I go into this in much more depth in my book, Before I Go, inviting you to start conversations now about this subject, regardless of whether you are caring for someone who is dying or not. The more we become comfortable with this kind of conversation, the easier it will be to accept what is the one thing that will happen to us all. Learn More If you’d like to learn more, and get your End Of Life Plan completed (If you haven't already) check out the Before I Go Method here. Also, if you’d like to check out my book Before I Go, you can do so by clicking here.

3 Tips On Talking To Someone Who Is Dying

January 26, 2023

Leave a Comment