What We Talk About When We Talk About Death

By Jane Duncan Rogers / May 9, 2017 /

Pushing up the daisies. Kicked the bucket. Passed on. You name it, we have a euphemism for anything to do with someone dying or who has died. Is this us trying to deny it happens?  Is it because we feel embarrassed or disconcerted? Is it because we would rather just ignore the whole topic, and…

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What’s the News Hardly Anyone Wants to Admit To?

By Jane Duncan Rogers / April 4, 2017 /

There’s actually not a lot that we can say we know for sure about life, but this is one of them. We get born, and then some time later, we die. Yes, it may be unpalatable news and uncomfortable at that, but it is TRUE! It really is.   What’s more, we cannot know how…

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7 Practical Ways to Set Yourself Up For a Good Death

By Jane Duncan Rogers / March 29, 2017 /

I never thought about death much, other than as a concept, until my husband was diagnosed with cancer in 2010. Then it made its entrance with a bang. Even though he was 65, it felt far too young to be contemplating death. We learnt a lot about each other, about life, and about death in…

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Can Abundance and Dying REALLY Go Together?

By Jane Duncan Rogers / October 18, 2016 /

Abundance. Dying. End of Life. Plentifulness. Not words you would normally think of together. But there’s often an abundance of laughter on my Before I Go group programmes and workshops. There’s plentiful amounts of stories, some amusing, some poignant, others educational. Then there’s also fear and anxiety and concern, more traditionally words associated with death and dying.…

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What It’s Really Like When Someone Dies: One Woman’s Story

By Jane Duncan Rogers / September 20, 2016 /

Thank God he’d stopped that awful rattling sound. Now his breaths were even, but with increasingly longer gaps in between. I knew this could go on for some time, but I was pretty surprised when ten minutes later, the gap just went on – and on, and on and on. And that moment – of…

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5 Reasons Why Death and Divorce Are Not the Same Thing – and 5 Why They Are

By Jane Duncan Rogers / July 17, 2016 /

One day, about 2 years after my husband died, I was at a social occasion with a group of friends I’d known for a while. One of them was suffering the aftermath of a recent divorce, seeing her ex-husband on the arms of a younger woman around town.   “Sorry”, she said, looking at me…

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3 Non-Actions To Take When Anxiety, Grief and Not-Knowing Are Your Bed Partners

By Jane Duncan Rogers / July 8, 2016 /

Fear gripped me, like a vice around my guts.  I treaded water in the swimming pool in which I had arrived for an early morning dip, before the heat of the day became too much. My friend had called from the terrace rooftop of the villa in which I was staying in Italy, on holiday.…

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Passwords – Keep Private or Share?

By Jane Duncan Rogers / May 25, 2016 /

In the UK’s Saturday Guardian, Adam Golightly writes an anonymous column (Widower of the Parish) recounting his challenges each week as a new widower and father to two children, since his wife Helen died in early April. This week, he faced another apparently small, but in experience huge, problem. The one of passwords. In my…

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One Simple Step to Integrating Loss, Endings, or Death into Your Life Right Now

By Jane Duncan Rogers / April 25, 2016 /

Life, it could be argued, is loss made manifest. From the moment a child is born, there are moments of loss – loss of who they were as a baby, a toddler, a young teenager. It continues into older age, with loss of interest in what fascinated us when younger, loss of energy for some,…

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Death, Grief and Paris Attacks

By Jane Duncan Rogers / November 15, 2015 /

When something like the Paris attacks happen, the words ‘gift’ and ‘grief’ absolutely do not sit well together. They are not meant to. How on earth can there be a gift when someone dies? It’s not possible. In the moment, there is only shock (even if you have been prepared for the death), horror, tears, sadness,…

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