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fear

3 Things to Do When You’re Afraid Of Your Spouse Dying First

By Jane Duncan Rogers / April 11, 2018 / 16 Comments

It was my greatest fear. Having had no children, the thought of my husband dying first and me being left alone in the world was something I simply couldn’t bear. Even if I had had children, the idea of my best friend, lover, business partner and companion leaving me behind was unbearable. So I didn’t…

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Making Time for Dying

By Jane Duncan Rogers / July 19, 2017 / 0 Comments

This last two weeks has been a bit challenging with my stepdaughter dying – those of you in my Facebook group will have heard this, and that’s also why I didn’t send an email this week. You can join here if you want to: https://www.facebook.com/groups/beforeIgo/ In fact, I am going to be taking a break for…

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5 Questions to Ask When Someone Is Actually Dying

By Jane Duncan Rogers / June 21, 2017 / 1 Comment

Have you noticed we often use euphemisms about death?  In my last blog on this, just recently I was advocating ‘telling it like it is’, and using words such as death, dying, die. But the fact is, when you come to meet someone whom you know probably has only weeks to live, is it really…

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Brexit,Trump, Death and Fear – What To Do Next

By Jane Duncan Rogers / January 20, 2017 / 9 Comments

Fear. That small word that has such an enormous impact. And today, the day of Donald Trump’s inauguration, there will be many people feeling any one of the words associated with fear – here’s just a few: anxiety, jittery, uncomfortable, alarmed, jumpy, distrustful, timid, shy, apprehensive, unsure, uncertain, scared, worried.   Recognise any of them?…

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3 Non-Actions To Take When Anxiety, Grief and Not-Knowing Are Your Bed Partners

By Jane Duncan Rogers / July 8, 2016 / 11 Comments

Fear gripped me, like a vice around my guts.  I treaded water in the swimming pool in which I had arrived for an early morning dip, before the heat of the day became too much. My friend had called from the terrace rooftop of the villa in which I was staying in Italy, on holiday.…

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Could grief REALLY be hiding a gift for you?

By Jane Duncan Rogers / September 17, 2015 / 0 Comments

Queuing in the fish and chip shop in the high street of the small Scottish town where I live, I scowled at a man ahead of me in the queue. He was overweight, fiddling with his cigarette packet, and aged about mid-50s. What was wrong with that? Everything! How dare HE be alive, he who…

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Grief Ambushes – What To Do?

By Jane Duncan Rogers / February 19, 2015 / 0 Comments

The tears gushed out suddenly when I passed the cream cheese in the supermarket aisle. It was so poignant, seeing this cheese, which I no longer needed to buy, and yet which had been one of the few foods that Philip could eat in his last months.

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What is grief?

By Jane Duncan Rogers / February 4, 2015 / 0 Comments

It’s feverish activity, and slumping for hours in a chair. It’s screaming your head off but remaining quiet; it’s forgetting little things and then forgetting that your loved one has died at all. It’s tears that never seem to stop flowing; and then a dam of tears that can’t break through; a boiling hot rage…

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